1) I have a Dell desktop and laptop. When I buy my next computer it's going to be a Mac laptop, because PCs suck.
2) When I was little, I wanted to be able to turn invisible as my superpower. Little did I know that I would eventually have that superpower, but that it only works in gay bars.
3) I'm in the Midwest on business. It's very flat, but there are lots of lakes and the people all are blond.
4) The fact that I'm from NY doesn't help me pull in bars.
5) I'm so fucking tired, but I'm also very hungry. I haven't decided which impulse will win.
6) And did I mention that the drinks are $3? I'm so fucking wasted that even if I did pull, nothing would happen.