Sick

So I've been sick for the last couple of days. Food poisoning, I think. (For those of you who saw The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee, think of the "can you use it in a sentence?" answer for 'dengue.')

Pros of food poisoning
1) Rapid weight loss (six pounds in two days)
2) Not having to go to work
3) Sleeping . . . lots and lots of sleeping

Cons of food poisoning
1) Running for the bathroom every 30 minutes or so
2) Dehydration headaches
3) Every part of my body hurting

While I feel much better today, I also feel really weak. I got winded walking up the subway stairs and right now I feel like I could put my head down on my desk and fall asleep.

Luckily, I can rest this weekend.

Frakity frak frak frak

So how good was last night's episode of Battlestar Galactica?

And how pissed am I that there are no new episodes until 2008?

Feeling good

I submitted a resume for a similar job to the one I have now. Two hours later, I got a call asking if I can interview this week.

Sweet.

What I did this weekend

1. Walked out of a play at intermission for only the second time in my life. Sure, I've wanted to other times, but usually at shows I've been reviewing, so I couldn't.

2. Ate dim sum with Jase, Charles, Patrick, and David. Mmmm . . . tripelicious.

3. Shaved. First time in years I've been without facial hair. Um . . . wow. Not sure how I feel about it yet.

Much better

Tylenol PM. That did the trick last night. It was the first uninterrupted night's sleep I've had in ages. I feel much better today.

It may also be because I got a jolt of inspiration for a short play that I'm going to submit for a ten-minute play contest. Started working on it last night and will have it ready to let some people read it by Monday.

I also started a new poem.

Man, having the creative juices flowing, so to speak, really does wonders for my mood.

Insomnia

So I've been having major trouble sleeping. Going to bed around 1. Not falling asleep until 2. Waking up every hour or so. Pain in the ass.

On the up side, I was watching Frasier last night and saw an episode that had T.R. Knight for maybe a minute as one of his patients. The show also had Sarah Silverman, Missi Pyle, and Dan Castellaneta.

It was only an okay episode, but how is that for guest stars?

The rule of three

I remember reading a book (gay fiction, natch) that had the following life lesson: you can have two of the three following things at any one time - a good job, a good apartment, a good relationship.

Now, my self-esteem being what it is, I've always believed I could have one of the three things at any time. When I moved to NY, I had a good apartment, the job was brutal, and I was alone. By the time the apartment got to be too much to handle (I had four roommates), I was liking the job, but I was still alone. When I moved to Chelsea, I loved the apartment, hated the job, and was alone.

Now I find myself hating my job, hating my apartment, and alone.

Bollocks.

The problem, of course, boils down to fear. I am scared to leave the security of my current job, I'm scared to go through the interviewing process, I'm scared to put myself out there. Same can be said for apartment and boyfriend hunting.

I'm not one to take chances. A great line from Wicked, "those who don't try/never look foolish." I spent my childhood being the one who was laughed at and made fun of. Naturally, I'm a little gun-shy nowadays.

So how do I beat that? How do I force myself to take the risks that I have to take? How do I keep from living my life in a safe monotonous rut?

Well, I've been applying for jobs, both in my current field (one opened up today) and in theatre. The apartment thing . . . well, I'm not going to worry about that for now. I think if I get myself in a good place as far as work, I'll care less about the apartment.

The boyfriend . . . I'm not sure I can tackle that one yet. The best I can do right now is to be more social. Go out with friends at least once a week. Maybe get involved in a new activity. I'd love to find a writing group to join.

We'll see, I suppose.

In the meantime, if anyone wants to hang out sometime, let me know. I need to get out of my house and out of my head.

Lambda Literary Awards Finalists

Here is a list of the Lambda Lit finalists. I'm psyched that I know several of the authors. Run out an buy a few books.

Nominees for ANTHOLOGY
Confessions of the Other Mother, edited by Harlyn Aizley (Beacon)
From Boys to Men, edited by Ted Gideonse & Rob Williams (Carroll & Graf)
Love, Bourbon Street, edited by Greg Herren & Paul J. Willis (Alyson)
Charmed Lives, edited by Toby Johnson & Steve Berman (Lethe Press)
No Margins: Writing Canadian Fiction in Lesbian, edited by Catherine Lake & Nairne Holtz (Insomniac)

Nominees for ARTS & CULTURE
Fun Home by Alison Bechdel (Houghton Mifflin)
Cinemachismo by Sergio de la Mora (University of Texas Press)
Sex Objects by Jennifer Doyle (University of Minnesota Press)
GAY L.A. by Lillian Faderman & Stuart Timmons (Basic Books)
Blood Beats: Vol 1 by Ernest Hardy (Redbone Press)

Nominees for BISEXUAL
Eros by Serena Anderlini-D'Onofrio (Harrington Park Press)
Affirmative Psychotherapy with Bisexual Women & Bisexual Men by Ronald C. Fox (Harrington Park Press)
Three Sides to Every Story by Clarence Nero (Harlem Moon/Doubleday)
Bi Guys, edited by Ron Jackson Suresha (Harrington Park Press)
Bi Men, edited by Ron Jackson Suresha & Pete Chvany (Harrington Park Press)
The Bisexual's Guide to the Universe, Michael Szymanski & Nicole Kristal (Alyson)

Nominees for CHILDRENS/YOUNG ADULT
The Manny Files by Christian Burch (Simon & Schuster)
Full Spectrum, edited by David Levithan & Billy Merrell (Random House Children's Books)
Between Mom & Jo by Julie Anne Peters (Little Brown)
Tale of Two Summers by Brian Sloan (Simon & Schuster)
Erik & Isabelle's Junior Year at Foresthill High by Kim Wallace (Foglight Press)

Nominees for DRAMA/THEATER
Questa by Victor Bumbalo (Broadway Publishing Inc.)
Confessions of a Mormon Boy by Stephen Fales (Alyson)
1001 Beds by Tim Miller (University of Wisconsin)

Nominees for HUMOR
Queen of the Oddballs by Hilary Carlip (HarperCollins)
My Lucky Star by Joe Keenan (Little Brown)
Roy & Al by Ralf Konig (Arsenal Pulp Press)

Nominees for LGBT NONFICTION
Hello, Cruel World by Kate Bornstein (Seven Stories)
GAY L.A. by Lillian Faderman & Stuart Timmons (Basic Books)
Different Daughters by Marcia Gallo (Carroll & Graf)
Behind the Mask of the Mattachine by James T. Sears (Harrington Park Press)
Unspeakable Love by Brian Whitaker (University of California)

Nominees for LGBT STUDIES
Every Inch A Man: Phallic Possession, etc. by Carellin Brooks (UBC Press)
Gay Power: An American Revolution by David Eisenbach (Carroll & Graf)
Their Own Receive Them Not by Horace Griffin (Pilgrim Press)
Crip Theory by Robert McRuer (NYU Press)
Beautiful Bottom, Beautiful Shame by Kathryn Stockton (Duke University Press)

Nominees for SCI-FI/FANTASY/HORROR
Carnival by Elizabeth Bear (Bantam Spectra)
Mordred, Bastard Son by Douglas Clegg (Alyson)
A Strong and Sudden Thaw by R.W. Day (Iris Print)
Izzy and Eve by Neal Drinnan (Green Candy Press)
Spin Control by Chris Moriarty (Bantam Spectra)

Nominees for SPIRITUALITY
Sex & the Sacred by Daniel Helminiak (Harrington Park Press)
The After-Death Room by Michael McColly (Soft Skull Press)
Spirited edited by Lisa Moore & G. Winston James (Redbone Press)
The Singing of Swans by Mary Saracino (Pearlsong Press )
Mobius Trip by Giti Thadani (Spinifex Press)

Nominees for TRANSGENDER
Transgender Rights edited Paisley Currah, Richard M. Juang, and Shannon Price Minter (University of Minnesota Press)
Drag King Dreams by Leslie Feinberg (Carroll & Graf)
Supervillainz by Alicia E. Goranson (Suspect Thoughts)
The Transgender Studies Reader edited by Susan Stryker & Chris Whittle (Routledge)
The Testosterone Files by Max Wolf Valerio (Seal Press)

Nominees for LESBIAN FICTION
Punk Like Me by JD Glass (Bold Strokes)
Slipstream by Leslie Larson (Crown)
Outrageous by Sheila Ortiz Taylor (Spinsters Ink)
Rose of No Man's Land by Michelle Tea (Macadam Cage)
The Night Watch by Sarah Waters (Riverhead Books)

Nominees for LESBIAN ROMANCE
Fresh Tracks by Georgia Beers (Bold Strokes)
Wild Abandon by Ronica Black (Bold Strokes)
Finders Keepers by Karin Kallmaker (Bella Books)
Chance by Grace Lennox (Bold Strokes)
Turn Back Time by Radclyffe (Bold Strokes)

Nominees for LESBIAN MYSTERY
Sleep of Reason by Rose Beecham, Rose (Bold Strokes)
Night Vision by Ellen Hart (St. Martins)
The Art of Detection by Laurie R. King (Bantam)
Idaho Code by Joan Opyr (Bywater Books)
The Weekend Visitor by Jessica Thomas (Bella Books)

Nominees for LESBIAN POETRY
Domain of Perfect Affection by Robin Becker (University of Pittsburgh)
Days of Good Looks by Cheryl Clarke (Carroll & Graf)
The Truant Lover by Juliet Patterson (Nightboat Books)
Lemon Hound by Sina Queyras (Coach House Books)
Touch to Affliction by Nathalie Stephens (Coach House Books)

Nominees for LESBIAN MEMOIR/BIOGRAPHY
Intimate Politics by Bettina Aptheker (Seal Press)
Fun Home by Alison Bechdel (Houghton Mifflin)
Queen of the Oddballs by Hilary Carlip (HarperCollins)
Hit by a Farm by Catherine Friend (Carroll & Graf)
Incognito Street by Barbara Sjoholm (Seal Press)

Nominees for LESBIAN EROTICA
Walk Like a Man by Laurinda D. Brown (Q-Boro Books)
Glamour Girls edited by Rachel Kramer Bussel (Harrington Park Press)
18th & Castro by Karin Kallmaker (Bella Books)
Master Han's Daughter by Midori (Circlet Press)
Best Lesbian Erotica 2007 edited by Tristan Taromino & Emma Donoghue (Cleis Press)

Nominees for LESBIAN DEBUT FICTION
The Teahouse Fire by Ellis Avery (Riverhead)Black Marks by Kirsten Dinnall Hoyte (Akashic)
Erzulie's Skirt by Ana-Maurine Lara (Redbone Press)
Slipstream by Leslie Larson (Crown)
Origami Striptease by Peggy Munson (Suspect Thoughts)

Nominees for GAY FICTION
Every Visible Thing by Lisa Carey (HarperCollins)
Izzy and Eve by Neal Drinnan (Green Candy Press)
Alternatives to Sex by Stephen McCauley (Simon & Schuster)
Now Is the Hour by Tom Spanbauer (Houghton Mifflin)
Suspension by Robert Westfield (HarperCollins)

Nominees for GAY ROMANCE
Someone Like You by Timothy James Beck (Kensington)
When the Stars Come Out by Rob Byrnes (Kensington)
Two Boys in Love by Lawrence Schimel (Seventh Window)
Surf 'N Turf by Scott & Scott (Romenticc)
Going Down in La-La Land by Andy Zeffer (Harrington Park Press)

Nominees for GAY MYSTERY
Mardi Gras Mambo by Greg Herren (Kensington)
The Hell You Say by Josh Lanyon (I-Universe)
The Back Passage by James Lear (Cleis Press)
Provincetown Follies, Bangkok Blues by Randall Peffer (Bleak House Books)
The Lucky Elephant Restaurant by Garry Ryan (NeWest Press)

Nominees for GAY POETRY
Gutted by Justin Chin (Manic D Press)
The Album That Changed My Life by Jeffrey Conway (Cold Calm Press)
A History of My Tattoo by Jim Elledge (Stonewall)
Other Fugitives & Other Strangers by Rigoberto Gonzalez (Tupelo Press)
When the Eye Forms by Dwaine Rieves (Tupelo)

Nominees for GAY MEMOIR/BIOGRAPHY
Untold Stories by Alan Bennett (FSG)
The Bill From My Father by Bernard Cooper (Simon & Schuster)
Tweaked by Patrick Moore (Kensington)
History of Swimming by Kim Powers (Carroll & Graf)
My Father's Keeper by Jonathan Silin (Beacon)

Nominees for GAY EROTICA
Best Gay Erotica 2007 edited by Richard Labonte & Timothy J. Lambert (Cleis Press)
A History of Barbed Wire by Jeff Mann (Suspect Thoughts)
Hot On His Trail by Zavo (Alyson)

Nominees for GAY DEBUT FICTION
A Scarecrow's Bible by Martin Hyatt (Suspect Thoughts)
Send Me by Patrick Ryan (Dial Press)
The Zookeeper by Alex MacLennan (Alyson)
Suspension by Robert Westfield (HarperCollins)
5 Minutes & 42 Seconds by Timothy Williams (HarperCollins)

From Today's TV Listings

Lost - Sawyer competes in a pingpong competition to get back his belongings.

Seriously, I am over this show.

Theatre recommendation

For those of you in Washington DC or who will be visiting, there is a great show at the Warehouse Theatre, Writer's Cramp by John Byrne. Very, very funny (kind of like Joe Orton) and a really talented cast.

Check it out.