Wednesday, July 20, 2005

Citizen Eng

Two men take a stand for your right to . . . well, stand.

I guess my only questions are:

1) Is there a minimum speed limit on the West Side Highway and are pedestrians required to walk at that limit or above? Because I'm out of shape and I don't think I can.

2) Are pedestrians in the city's riverside parks required to obey the various nautical laws? Because I'm not carrying an anchor around with me all day on the off chance I decide to chat with a friend by the river.

3) If you sit on a park bench that is less than 15' from a fire hydrant, will the Park Police fine you? Because that sounds like entrapment.

4) Does 'alternate side parking' mean pedestrians can't use the other side of the street?

5) If pedestrians refuse to move after getting ticketed by the Park Police, will they have them towed? And where would they put that wicked looking hook?

I guess I should address these questions to Parks Commissioner Adrian Benepe. Here's his online contact if you want to ask him yourself.

6 comments:

jwer said...

Please tell me you have sent those questions to him... also, see you this weekend!

Crash said...

I'm planning to send something a tad less sarcastic . . . but just a tad.

I'm very psyched about the weekend. Could you arrange for it to be cool and overcast?

Jeff said...

I suspect it must be the same in New York, that everyone knows that Park Police are quite a lot like university campus police and rent-a-cops: big egos, little skills, fake badge, no gun, tiny dicks.

jwer said...

I have arranged for brief thunderstorms on Saturday morning, but I'm afraid that's the best that I can do on short notice.

David said...

Courtesy, Professionalism, Respect.

I feel safer already.

musica said...

YOUR BLOG IS GOOD, IT IS REALLY NICE. HERE YOU CAN LEARM MORE ABOUT penis enlargement TO FIND penis enlargement