Oh, come on!

Okay. Patrick is back in the hosptial. And I just found out that my friend Stuff has been in a hospital in Hong Kong for the last week with something the doctors can't diagnose.

Bugger.

Look on the sunny side

So the last week and a half has been like a series of swift kicks to the nuts. Today's news is that one of my former rugby teammates died unexpectedly. He was a really good kid, and I'm absolutely gutted.

So here's the deal. I need some good news. Please, please, please leave a comment and let me know something good that is happening in your life. It doesn't matter what it is. I just really need to hear something happy.

Actually knowing kind of sucks, too.

The phone call was bad. One of my oldest friends (we've known each other nearly 30 years) tried to kill herself on Monday. She refused psychiatric treatment, so her family had to have her involuntarily committed. She told everyone that she is just going to try again as soon as they let her out.

She's had a really, really rough time the last several years, and she's been depressed, though I had no idea how badly.

Naturally, I'm turning this all around on myself right now. Maybe if I'd called more often. Maybe if I'd gone home to visit. Maybe if I'd just paid more attention to the signs. All that bullshit.

I found all this out yesterday afternoon. I went home after visiting Patrick and went to bed. Basically 3-4 hours early. That's how my body/mind copes with things . . . by shutting down.

Today, everything is an effort. Waking, dressing, being at work. Everything seems hazy and I'm so fucking tired.

I wish it were the weekend already.

It's the not knowing that's the worst

Today's theme appears to be "we'll get back to you."

I'm waiting to find out how Patrick is doing after his surgery.

I'm waiting to find out if I got the new job.

I'm waiting to hear back from a friend from back home who left a message on my phone at 6 a.m. saying she needed to talk to me about a mutual friend and asked me to call her back as soon as possible. She wasn't home so I had to leave a message.

I'm waiting to hear if anyone is going to attend this Porno Bingo thing that I have to go to tomorrow, since one of my not-for-profits is the beneficiary. As it stands now, it doesn't look like it will be well attended.

As much as I hate the waiting, I also hate the thought that some of the answers to the questions could be bad.

Meme

Taken from Timothy.

ONE. WORD. MEME.

1. Where is your cell phone? Backpack.
2. Describe your boyfriend/girlfriend/S.O.? Theoretical.
3. Your hair? Corporate.
4. Your mother? Wonderful.
5. Your father? Frustrated.
6. Your favorite item? Books.
7. Your dream last night? Political.
8. Your favorite drink? Lemonade.
9. Your dream car? Limo.
10. The room you are in? White.
11. Your ex? Nonexistent.
12. Your fear? Failure.
13. What do you want to be in 10 years? Better.
14. Who did you hang out with last night? Friends.
15. What you’re not? Fearless.
16. The last thing you did? E-mailed.
17. What are you wearing? Khakis.
18. Your favorite book? Many.
19. The last thing you ate? Lunch.
20. Your life? Uneventful.
21. Your mood? Anxious.
22. Your friends? Busy.
23. What are you thinking about right now? Assignments.
24. Your car? Subway.
25. What are you doing at the moment? Typing.
26. Your summer? Hot.
27. Your relationship status? Alone.
28. What is on your TV? Dust.
29. When is the last time you laughed? Today.
30. Last time you cried? Recently.
31. School? Work.

And speaking of events . . . GB:NY4!!!!!!

GB:NY4, May 25-28

Details to follow.

And as an homage to the various IV movies out there, here are some possible taglines for us to use (let me know which one you like the best):

Get ready for the next world war (Rocky IV)

Three Times Before You Have Felt The Terror, Known The Madness, Lived The Horror. But This Is The One You've Been Screaming For. (Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter)

On land, on sea, or in the air, no place is safe from them! (Police Academy 4: Citizens on Patrol)

It's ancient wisdom against teenage spunk. (The Next Karate Kid)

They said it was over. They were wrong. (Omen IV: The Awakening)

The erotic masterpiece (Emmanuelle IV)

Pure Evil Never Really Dies (Nightmare on Elm Street 4)

While I think the quote from Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter is the most appropriate, I'm really leaning toward The Next Karate Kid. Go figure.

Now, start spreading the news so we have lots of people attending.

Come to this event!

The RSVP deadline was yesterday, but it's not too late.

From my friend David:

Dear Friends: I hope you can join me on Wed, April 11 to help launch a big event for my new pet GLBT charity - The Trevor Project. This event is FREE, but we hope you'll consider buying a ticket for our big summer gala dinner and award show on June 25th. We'll have more info on tickets, performers and honorees at the kick-off party - but trust me, they're BIG!

RSVP to events@thetrevorproject.org!

The Trevor Project is a non-profit organization that operates the only nationwide, around-the-clock suicide prevention helpline for gay and questioning youth. The Trevor Helpline, 866.4.U.TREVOR, is a free and confidential service that offers hope through its trained counselors. The organization was founded by three filmmakers whose film, Trevor, about a teenager who attempts suicide after realizing that he might be gay, received the 1994 Academy Award® for Best Short Film (Live Action).

Wed, April 11
7 - 10pm
Ultra
37 West 26th St.

Escape from Wolfram & Hart

I've been called in for a second interview for the job I applied for a couple of weeks ago.

Fingers crossed.

My job

Today's things I hate about working at Wolfram & Hart*:

1) None of the fraking equipment works (two fax machines on my floor . . . neither works).

2) The first year associates make (after bonus) triple what I make. And I make less than my colleagues at other firms.

3) The Senior Partners expect me to place all their pet projects, but won't back me up when I need to place real work.

4) Lawyers get new chairs every year. I've had three in the last decade. And the third one (my current one), I had to steal from an empty office.


*Sorry for the Angel reference, but at times I'm fairly certain they based that firm on mine.

Feeling Better

I'm alive. Still feeling a little worn down, but that's how it goes.

Also, Bravo has been showing the final episode of Six Feet Under (I've seen it three times in the last week). Very emotional. Still makes me cry a little.

Anyway, pictures of my newly beardless chin will follow soon.