Worse than death

There are few things worse than a family funeral. Well, clearly there are lots of things worse . . . vivisection, genocide, sleeping with Donald Rumsfeld, to name but a few.

I suppose the best thing to say is family funerals suck. Big time.

For me, it's less about the deceased - they're beyond mortal concerns, in a better place, blah, blah, blah - it's about seeing people I love in pain. When my grandmother passed away a couple of years ago, it was the only time I can remember seeing my dad lose it. We are not an extremely demonstrative family, so when I say 'lose it,' I'm not talking about gnashing of teeth and rending of garments. He just couldn't speak. And he cried, which I had never seen.

Recently, I went to another funeral and this time it was my mom who was grieving. Seeing her cry feels like being cut by razor blades or splashed with acid. It's so unexpected and alien. Deep down inside, there's a part of me that is still a little kid who thinks his parents are invincible. It's always a shock to be reminded that they aren't.

And of course, there is the ever-present reminder that someday (God willing not for a long, long time), I will be standing by the coffin of someone I love, someone who should have been invincible. And when I think of that, I'm struck with a dread, paralyzing fear. And following right behind that feeling is the greater fear that when I'm the one in the coffin, there will be no one standing next to it, mourning me.

The History Boys

I saw the new Alan Bennett play last night. Wonderful. Fantastic cast, great story, terrific production.

Ouch

I went to rugby practice for the first time in well over a year. Needless to say, I was really sore this weekend. Really, really sore.

Man, I am out of shape.

Scary movie

The other day I was in the mood to be cheered up, so I went to see Scary Movie 4. I figured the first ones were okay (with each getting progressively worse, though), so this one would probably be okay, too.

Man, this movie was twelve different kinds of awful.

Anyway, save yourself the money and wait until the DVD comes out. Then don't rent it.

Oh, the weather outside was frightful . . .

But my day was so delightful.

Interview: Aced it.
Charity Event: Wonderful.

Good food. Good wine (really, really good wine). Good company. Got to meet and talk to Anthony Rapp. Saw Patrick in administrative mode. Saw FARB sober. Frankly, it was like being in Wonderland.

So to make up for my fun time yesterday, I overslept this morning and was an hour late to a breakfast meeting.

As the philosopher once said, "D'oh!"

WTF?

It's snowing. Why is it snowing?

In other news, I have another job interview. With any luck, I'll have to choose between the two jobs. On the down side, if I don't get offered either of them, I can pretty much be assured a spiral of depression and self-loathing.

Either way, it's something to look forward to.

Oops

I just sent an e-mail to the HR Director in my company. Since I was trying to find out the number of employees, I wrote "Head Count" in the subject line.

Only I seem to have missed the letter "o".

Thank God for spell check. I think she would have been pissed.