Where to start?

Let's see. Palochi was in town. My liver hasn't quite recovered. I've seen what seems like a bazillion plays and have reviewed many of them for the two review websites I submit to. Last night I saw Red Light Winter with David; very cool, both in terms of the play and the company. I have a job interview next week; the salary is around $10,000 more than what I make now for the exact same job.

Good times.

No, seriously

Pillow. Smother. Now.

I'm actually okay if I keep standing. If I sit for more than a few minutes, I sort of lock in place and have a really hard time standing up.

This blows.

Ouch

Threw my back out this weekend. In a great deal of pain. I used up the last of my muscle relaxers from last time. Crap.

If anyone wants to come over and smother me with a pillow, I'd appreciate it.

You like me!

It appears that I won the Academy Award for best picture last night. As a rule, I tend not to photograph well, so if any of you more technologically-minded youngsters could send me a copy of whatever picture of me it was that won the award, I'd be forever in your debt.

All I need now is a Tony, Grammy and Emmy and I can legitimately call myself the Rita Moreno of my generation.

Mmmm . . . Sloane

Last night English David and I went to see a preview of Joe Orton's Entertaining Mr. Sloane with Alec Baldwin, Chris Carmack, Richard Easton and Jan Maxwell.

Really good, and not just because Carmack is beautiful. The cast was phenomenal, the sets were great, and even though the play is 40 years old, it isn't creaky.

A pet peeve of mine is people who applaud when someone famous makes their entrance. Yes, Alec Baldwin is well-known. But for god's sake, all he did was walk through a door. Save it for the end.

Whee

In what is surely a fit of insanity, I have tickets for six shows this week. One show each on Tues., Wed., and Thurs. and three shows on Saturday. I only have to review three of them.

If anyone wants to be my 'plus one' for any of them, drop me a line.

And now for something completely different

Sorry for yesterday's self-pity post. In a variety of ways, the last couple of weeks have sucked. But as the philosopher says, what doesn't kill us, leaves us in agonizing, soul-crushing pain, screaming for death's sweet embrace.

Anyhoo.

Despite my general bad mood and The Blizzard of Aught Six, I saw two shows this weekend. Well, in point of fact, I had to review them, so I couldn't bail, which is what I really, really wanted to do.

So, the shows were Edenville and Kiss and Cry. Both were good shows (and full of eye candy). Edenville has one of the guys from Dante's Cove, a gay soap opera/supernatural thriller/mini-series thing that was on the Here! on demand channel. The guy was way cuter in person.

Anyway, I think Kiss and Cry was the better show, but both of them were worth checking out. Especially since the tickets are reasonably priced.

Last night I attended WYSIWYG's Worst. Sex. Ever. show which was marvelous, as usual. I'll write a little more about it once I dig out from under the pile of work (and two theatre reviews) that I have to do, but I will leave you with these topics that were covered: underwater cunnilingus performed by Jacques Cousteau; a war between good and evil fought over a vagina; various instances of vomitting on genitalia; and plenty of other stories that make my worst experiences seem okay.

Well, except for the guy I went out with who wanted me to spit in his mouth. That still kind of icks me.

Anyway, more about WYSIWYG later.

St. Hallmark's Day

Nothing like a Hallmark holiday to make your life feel pathetic.

I am so fucking sick of being alone.

A teammate and a friend

If there's another world, he lives in bliss;
If there is none, he made the best of this.
-Robert Burns

Rest in peace, Doug.

Bad Day

It's been a really bad day.

Catch up

So the weekend was fun. I went to Jess and Marc's house. We ate, we drank, we were merry. As always, a fun and relaxing weekend in the 'burbs.

Monday was the NY Nightlife Awards with English David. Fun time. And now I can say that I've seen Elaine Stritch, Eartha Kitt, and Lesley Gore perform live. I also saw Charles Busch and Brian Stokes Mitchell, but I've seen them perform before. I majorly heart Charles Busch.

A couple of stand-out performances were given by A Little Traveling Music (never heard of them, but they were great) and Creation Nation (whom I'd heard of, but never made it over to Ars Nova [I think] to see).

It was a great night.

One other cool thing. So I'm watching last night's Lost and I think to myself, hey, the girl that Sawyer's scamming in his flashback looks familiar. Turns out she's a girl who was in the drama department with me in college. In fact, I was the stage manager for the first play she was in.

Now she gets to make out with Sawyer in Hawaii while I'm stuck in a crappy, drudge job, making out with no one.

Bollocks.

Brokeback to the Future

Really funny.

Light as a feather, stiff as a board

Some friends and I are doing a weight-loss challenge. We each chip in $50; winner clears $300. Woo hoo.

I'm down 9 lbs. so far. Woo hoo, again.

Between the eating right, working out (I got up at 6 a.m. to go to the gym this morning), getting plenty of sleep and drinking gallons of water, I've felt amazing for the last week.

I will admit that having my clothes fit better has perked me up some, too.

And speaking of perking, does anyone else find that they get frisky when they're dieting?

Things You Should Do This Week

Go see two shows before they close.

A Midsummer Night's Dream at Vital Theater on the Upper West Side. Wild, amazing fun. Closes this weekend.

A Myth Cycle: Ahraihsak at Theatre Mitu. Long, but absolutely amzaing show influenced by Asian forms. It uses masks, puppetry, stylized movement and language to tell a story that would have made Joseph Campbell proud. Sublime. Closes this weekend.

Um . . . WTF?

Today I received my online Time Warner bill. It was for $13,567.67.

I think I may drop Showtime and Cinemax.

Sorry

I find that I have nothing to write about.

By the way

My theatre reviewing seem to be going okay. I've had four reviews published and one of my reviews has been blurbed on the show's publicity materials. Woo hoo!

Soon I'll be as famous as . . . um . . . any of those other famous theater reviewers whose names I don't know.

Le sigh.

Speaking of which, if any of you want to join me at a children's theatre show I'm reviewing tomorrow, I'd love the company.

Yeah. I thought not.

So tomorrow, I may blog about my New Year's resolutions.

Yeah, so I'm back

Holidays were fine. In fact, they were actually really great.

Unfortunately, everything has kind of sucked since I got back.

So there you go. Happy 2006.

Bah. Humbug.

Now that the holidays are fully upon us, I'm retreating into my hard, crusty shell (melts in your mouth, not in your hands) and turning my back on my fellow man (there's a joke in there somewhere, but I'm not going to bother looking for it).

Anyhoo, I think I'm done blogging for the year. See you in 2006.



By the way, I've turned on comments moderation since my archives are filling up with spam faster than a Hawaiian who just cashed his paycheck, so if you comment on anything in the next week or two, it might not show up for a while.

I'm turning into my dad

Generally, I like unions. I'm a tree-huggin' lefty who believes that they make sure workers don't get exploited by unfeeling companies.

That being said, TWU Local 100 would have to work pretty damn hard to convince me that they're being exploited. Average salary is $45,000-$68,000 counting overtime (according to the NY Sun). Not damn bad for people who, on average, don't have college degrees. Plus they don't pay for their benefits, get to retire at 55, get full pension after 25 years, and get full medical once they retire.

I have a college degree (three, actually). My salary is slightly above the high range of their average. But I pay for my benefits. I can't retire until I'm 65. And my office has recently cancelled our pensions. And I sure as hell don't get any medical other than Medicare after I retire.

So should I feel sorry for the transit workers? Sorry, ain't gonna happen.

And it doesn't help that their union president is such a cunt. Roger Toussaint pretty much represents the worst that the unions have to offer. He's a little man with a Napoleon complex who is threatening other people's livelihoods and safety in order to get his moment in the spotlight.

Well, thank God for two things: the Taylor laws and my upcoming vacation. With any luck, when Roger throws his hissy and calls a strike, the Taylor laws will smack him down and I'll be enjoying my vacation way the hell away from here.